It’s hard to find dementia relief from home. Check out the power of media!

How Do You Feel?

When Pop died, oldest son Bobby handled the slideshow—it was terrific—and I handled the memorial service. Also terrific. I included some of Pop’s favorite stories, and some of Pop’s favorite music.

Following one song, my older brother Billy got up to speak. He’s quite eloquent, a great speaker, and everybody was looking forward to his insight. He said “I’ve got to say, I’m glad that song is over. If Pop was here right now, he’d say ‘Turn that shit off!’”.

Everybody laughed. 

It was the perfect way to break the tension following a deep, meaningful song. Nobody will ever convince me a Bette Midler choice is wrong, but it did bring the mood down. We were, indeed, having a great time. The photo montage covered all parts of Pop’s life, and had everybody tapping each other and nodding back and forth. The speakers brought laughter and tears in equal measure, and at times brought the house down. Media of all types, in its own right, can control the room just as easily as humans. 

Let’s learn how to harness that energy to support the needs of your elderly loved one. Let’s talk about one of the best dementia relief methods from home. Let’s talk about the power of media.

Research Shows Media Can Impact Brain Waves

“Because of the plasticity of our brains… if you change your habits, your brain is happy to go along with whatever you do,” according to neuropsychologist Joyce Schenkein, so it is important to fill our brain with uplifting, positive messages to encourage increased brain activity in our dementia patient, in addition to boosting mood. By incorporating a variety of media into the daily “diet” of our senior citizens, we can create habits and make positive changes with very little effort.

I know you’ve got a million things on your list to get done, and the organizational chart for caring for your loved one is long and deep and difficult to keep up with. Am I asking you to add something else to the mix? Yup. Only because I think it is worth it. Start to be more mindful and considerate with the media that your loved one consumes. There is tremendous evidence about what those horrible fighting and war-type video games is doing to our youth. This is your opportunity to harness the opposite of that media to benefit the long-term health of your loved one. 

The benefits will be immediate and long-lasting.

Dementia Relief From Home Is Like Relieving Boredom

Before dementia ravaged Mom’s brain, she was quite active. In addition to handling a lot of the cooking and some of the cleaning in our house, she ventured out on a daily basis for shopping, browsing, and lunch. Three days a week were devoted—and I do mean devoted—to playing Bingo at a local casino. Bingo gave her quite a bit more than the occasional win—it gave her a large social circle of people who looked for her, watched out for her, and shared their neverending gossip with her. She loved going to Bingo to see “the girls”.

It was a routine that I wholeheartedly encouraged—and I was very sad when it came to an end. I didn’t care one little bit about how much money she was spending (well, she was pretty lucky, too), because she was getting “paid back” on the daily in the mental and emotional boost that was her Bingo ritual. The end of this ritual was, unfortunately, quite abrupt, and she will still mention it from time to time, because it was that important to her.

Now, boredom is the constant enemy. 

I walked into her room at The Facility today and was met with a dismal sight. She was sitting, still in her pajamas, in a silent room staring out the window. Sound at all familiar to you? I sure hope not, but I’m guessing you can relate. The abject lack of stimulation in her room was deafening, and I needed to change it immediately.

I greeted her warmly, as usual, and immediately set out changing her environment. While readying her shower, I put music on my phone in the bathroom. Meanwhile, Sweet Husband got the television going to her favorite movie station and opened the blinds a little more. Within thirty minutes, she was not only clean, but humming a tune from her past and asking Sweet Husband what the movie was about. 

Sometimes it really is just that easy. 

I Can Change That…

There are so many things about this devil dementia that I can’t control. Mom and I are almost completely at the whim of this disease, with moods changing constantly, and memories coming and going at record speed. Physically, at 92, bodily functions are slowly but surely starting to decline, which is both frustrating and embarrassing to Mom, and makes her very sad and depressed.. 

There is, indeed, dementia relief in her new home; I can absolutely control her media intake. Let’s see how:

Music

There is no doubt in my mind that music has the ability to alter mood, and the research certainly agrees! “Music has the ability to evoke powerful emotional responses such as chills and thrills in listeners” and can quickly change Mom’s mood from somber to happy and excited in just a few notes. In addition to the basic enjoyment of the song at the time, playing uplifting music has other benefits as well. Not only does it inspire anticipation—waiting for the chorus or the next song on the playlist—but it can evoke long forgotten and important memories.

Often, when listening to a song, Mom will tell stories about what she was doing when the song was first released, or the first time she heard it. It’s so very easy nowadays to find and play all types of music. Try it the next time you are with your loved one and the mood is a little too dark and quiet—you’ll be shocked at what the music brings from their memories!

Movies

An avid moviegoer, it’s hard even now to find a movie Mom doesn’t remember on some level. If she doesn’t remember the actual title, she will recognize one or two of the actors. From time to time, she recognizes the sets from Universal, Hollywood! That’s how powerful these memories are to her.

Movies are an excellent bridge for us to “indulge in some positive movies that’ll remind you of the beauty of the world and our relationships” by using some of the movies on that list. Mom loves TCM particularly because it shows movies without any commercials. Last month, for example, every day was devoted to one specific movie star, and Mom had a field day catching up on all of her favorites. Added bonus: TCM movies are 24 hours a day, and have come in very handy during some of Mom’s insomnia periods. 

TV Shows

Research shows that carefully choosing television shows “that inspire hope, follow a character as they overcome challenges, and ones with messages about community and belonging, made the list, as well as ones that were simply fun to watch” could help keep your loved one happier and more relaxed.

TV shows are lower on my list than movies for Mom, but there are absolutely some series on Netflix and Hulu that we have used to support both Mom’s interests and her moods. A avid lover of westerns, both platforms have great series that focus on families in the current and historical western part of our country. Waiting a week to see the next episode just isn’t in the cards for Mom anymore, but with the paid platforms, we can “binge watch” with her several episodes at a time. 

Magazines

Don’t underestimate the value of the written word! Mom’s generation focused on reading long before tv and movies overtook the scene, and can be quite useful even today. They are perfect for Mom right now, because her attention span for reading has dropped significantly, but is still long enough for a Reader’s Digest or People Magazine story. I like bringing her a magazine once a week, because she can easily flip through it several times, stopping at a different story each time. 

Mom never read books—she just couldn’t get into them. If your elderly loved one still enjoys a good book, consider your choices with their mood and stability in mind. For you, this could be a great dementia relief system at home.

This website https://happiful.com/mood-boosting-books/ puts out a list every year of mood-inspiring books. Add a few of these to your parents’ library to keep their mood light and even-keeled.

Is It Worth It?

I’m not with Mom 24/7 anymore. I control less and less as dementia takes over her mind and general decline takes over her body. When I’m with her, I want to do the best I can to have a great visit. AND, when I leave, I want to walk out of a scenario more uplifting than what I walked into.

So we listened to some music while she danced in the shower.

She explained to Sweet Husband why this actor was a hack and exactly who was better than him in westerns. 

She made a comment about the actress on the cover of People magazine, and how embarrassed her mother must be for her to appear in that outfit. 

Her brain was firing on all cylinders for that two hour visit.

It is worth everything. 

Oh, and by the way, Billy…it was another Bette Midler song!!!

THANK YOU FOR READING THIS FAR!!!

Wow! You made it! Thank you for reading about dementia relief from home!

Hey, since you’re here! You may as well check out why we keep extra mayonnaise, here, or see a more in depth look at strokes and seizures, here! Or, check out our other topics here! Either way, I appreciate you!

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